Tag Archives: retro

Tone Lōc has “Funky Cold Medina.” I have…

Guaranteed to quench your vices.
A pile of ham and a dose of spices.
Served with salad, maybe rices.
It’s budget-minded, low on prices.
Blowin’ up on your devices.
Hoes love spunky shoulder slices.

Spunky Shoulder Slices

Covergirl

If you know me, you know I had no choice but to find and acquire this magazine. 

Eek
November 1908 Farm Life magazine — was in rough shape but Photoshop helped me de-age it some.
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The perfect word.

Behold, the out-of-print poster you never knew you wanted.

The perfect word.
Found in Rolling Stone Magazine, May 22, 1975.
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Just when you thought it was just a turkey in the straw…

One Girl

One girl possesses the mysterious power to control the wheat strawworm, just as the legends foretold.

But what if she doesn’t stop there?

Coming soon to a theater near you from the U.S. Department of Agriculture… Farmers’ Bulletin No. 1323 – The Wheat Strawworm and Its Control

Sometimes the stalks get stalked.

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An angry thunderbolt of terror explodes out of the ocean’s depths!

♬ DaadumbDaadumbDadumb dadumb dadumb dadumb.

Orca
Found on the back cover of Marvel’s The Tomb of Dracula, Lord of Vampires #60 (September 1977) comic book.

Jaws it ain’t.

“A lousier movie may get made one of these days or years, but it will have to wrest the trophy from the dead and icy grasp of Orca.” — LA Times

“If it were medically possible to overdose on claptrap, Orca, which opened yesterday at the Criterion and other theaters, would be compelled to carry a warning from the Surgeon General.” — The New York Times

Well, now I’m probably going to have to find and watch it.

Spoiler alert: Bo Derek (in her movie debut) supposedly gets her leg chomped off in this masterpiece.

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Coca-Cola 1906 – Victorians sure talked purdy.

Fun fact: Just three years before this 1906 ad from Massengale Advertising ran, cocaine was removed from the Coca-Cola formula.

1906 Coca-Cola Massengale magazine ad
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Ah-h-h, man… there’s real flavor!

I was excited to discover that a 1948 issue of Dakota Farmer that I won at auction had a full page ad for Grain Belt beer. Even better, 70 or so years ago, some kid colored in the teeth of the feller in the ad, which as we all know, increases its value in the collectibles market by at least 50x.

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A Music Memory

I remember the music section of Osco Drug in Kirkwood Mall back when I was a kid. All the audio cassettes were in a sealed wall on one side of an aisle, and the wall of cassettes were covered by a giant plexiglass cover with a bunch of round holes in it. Additionally, each cassette was in an extra security case. You could look through the plexiglass/holes and look at all the cassette spines for a cassette you wanted, then reach in through one of the holes and pull it out of the wall. The holes were big enough for your hand to go in, but not big enough to pull your hand out along with the cassette in its security case. So what you had to do was drop the cassette to the bottom (often cracking the cover), where there was a narrow conveyor belt between the wall and plexiglass. Then you had to get an employee to come over and activate the conveyor belt to move the cassette to the side where the employee could access it, remove the security case and then sell the cassette to you.

Some people get nostalgic for the past, but that was pretty effed up.

Soo-wee!

Ain’t no smell like a pig farm, ‘cept maybe a boy raised on a pig farm.

You say “yip like a terrier” like it’s a bad thing.

Yip. Doggie trivia: Terriers are described as small, wiry, game, fearless, and created to hunt vermin.
Good ol’ Rugged Rock Hudson — Found on the back cover of an April, 1956 Coronet magazine.
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