The Lion King remake is awful.

Chicks dig it.

Found in a 1903 issue of Life magazine.

Odds and ends:

A portière (mentioned at the bottom of the ad) is a hanging curtain placed over a door or doorway. I am not sure if a beaded curtain officially qualifies as a portière, but why not, eh?

Online, I found a couple of variations of the Lewando’s mother cat delicately and lovingly hanging the chicks up to dry, and when in color, each of the clothespinned chicks is a different color. Probably because of their dyeing services, but maybe just because it’s cute. Dye hard.

“Cleansing” sounds much more elegant and thorough than “cleaning”. You can probably charge more for it.

Sometimes Lewando’s has an apostrophe, and sometimes Lewandos doesn’t have an apostrophe. Lewando does what Lewando wants.

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“Your time has expired, leave.”

Ouch.
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This Week in Ephemera

This is a score! The entire 1916 year of McCall’s magazine and in beautiful condition, especially considering these twelve issues are over a hundred years old.

A Dumb Yet Strangely Awesome Way to Die

Just my type.

I thought I had a chance at this wonderfully odd Williams typewriter invented by John Newton Williams and the first typewriter where the typist could actually see what they just typed (Williams also invented one of the first helicopters and a 3-cylinder motorcycle). It was the first item up for auction. The typewriter went for $1,200. I did not have a chance.

Armour Hot Dogs Jingle 2019

♬ Hot dogs, Armour hot dogs.
What kind of kids eat Armour hot dogs?
Fat kids, skinny kids, kids who climb on rocks,
Tough kids, sissy kids, even kids with chicken pox,
But not kids with measles,
Because thanks to their anti-vax parents,
They are now dead and can no longer
Love hot dogs, Armour hot dogs.
The dogs kids love to bite! 

Everyone would be in love with me.

The kid who sings about wishing to be an Oscar Mayer wiener suffers from childhood deprivation, acting out in desperation to fill the void that cannot be filled. He will soon be consumed by his own emotional hunger, forever longing like a withered gas station roller dog.

It’s not the meat, it’s the motion.

Tsk. She can do better.

…and one thing to not make.