Tag Archives: slogans

My 1999 prediction for the first Apple wearable — Qwerto!

Note: Back in the 90s, I did a few slogan and jingle contests on my agency’s website and also created the scenarios for each season. What you will find below was one of them. (I hope to have the rest of them preserved here in the near future.)

The PAW! World’s Worst Slogan Game Scenario Number Seven: Project Qwerto

It’s been another run-of-the-mill Monday morning at the ol’ advertising agency. You promptly showed up for work three hours late and have settled into the daily grind of creating marvelous, cutting-edge ads for your admiring roster of global clients. And a small black and white print advertisement for the local babushka factory.

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The SMEAT smell of success.

The holy grail of fictitious Hollywood food products is now in my possession.

SMEAT!

Life is good. And rather high in sodium.
____________________

SMEAT still needs a good tagline, though. One that can crush “Break The Monotony” for Hormel’s SPAM.

Have a SMEAT.

Tastes like feet. SMEAT.

You can’t beat the SMEAT!

It’s so SMEATy!

Just SMEAT it.

SMEAT yourself right.

It’s not meat; it’s SMEAT!

Enjoy the SMEAT life.

Heat. Eat. SMEAT.

SMEAT me!

Got a better one? Send it in a comment below.

Subhead Fail of the Month

I’m pretty sure this qualifies as ironic, don’cha think?