Category Archives: totally off topic

Poor Little Turtle Children

slow turtle child

It horrifies and sickens me that some parents would publicly shame their underperforming children like this.

You best mend your ways, Hot Liquid, or it’ll lead to a life of ruin!

Caution Hot Liquid!

Pokémon or questionable genital nickname?

magikarp62480

Bulbasaur
Charmander
Weedle
Beedrill
Pidgey
Spearow
Vulpix
Jigglypuff
Oddish
Mankey
Poliwag
Machop
Bellsprout
Tentacruel
Graveler
Slowpoke
Dewgong
Grimer
Cloyster
Gastly
Krabby
Cubone
Lickitung
Rhyhorn
Horsea
Electabuzz
Pinsir
Ninetales
Gyarados
Flareon
Snorlax
Squirtle

Twitter needs to change this to “Moments are not loading at this moment.”

Twitter Moments

Beware of Buns of Steel

Behold, the Asshole Lane.

Behold, the Asshole Lane (AKA the Testy Twat Triangle). It is found at the intersection of Main Avenue and 26th Street in Bismarck, North Dakota.

Home of the Asshole Lane

Home of the Asshole Lane


Its origin was probably one of good intentions, or at least an attempt to correct a mistake, but all that has long been forgotten. Continue reading

Bottom 12 Failed Guy Fieri Catchphrases

Bottom 12 Failed Guy Fieri Catchphrases

12. “Well, lick my scab!”

11. “Holy E. Coli!”

10. “That’ll frost the pubes!”

9. “Well, grill my gonads!”

8. “That’ll strangle the hooker!”

7. “This is out of butts!”

6. “F*ck the front door!”

5. “Well, butter my butt plug!”

4. “This is gangbangin’!”

3. “Off the nipple!”

2. “That’s tampon!”

1. “Twist off my taint and call me a marsupial!”

20 Righteous Republican Jokes for Republicans Who Think Republican Things Republicanly

1.
Q: Why do Trolls live under bridges?
A: Obama.
Continue reading

If you thought those Star Wars prequels were bad, you ain’t seen nuthin’ yet!

Step right up and don’t be shy, because you will not believe your eyes!

Behold, the carnival-attraction majesty of Space Odyssey 2000!

Space Odyssey 2000 is not to be confused with “2001: A Space Odyssey” — It’s completely different! Totally different! Continue reading

The mall caper goes awry.

“Maybe applying super glue to our suction cups wasn’t such a great idea, Frankie.”

“Shaddap yer mug and keep still and mebbe nobody will spot us, Johnny.”

“But we’ve been stuck here since midnight, Frankie!”

“Shaddap and make like a deer in headlights, Johnny.”

“I really gotta pee, Frankie!”

“Shaddap!”