No matter how nice you were asking,
Karen was totes against masking.
In science she’d scoff
As she said with a cough,
“In Covid I’d rather be basking.”
A Pandemic Limerick
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Tag Archives: coronavirus
Wise up. Mask up.
Rebranding the Virus
I imagine the guys who refuse to wear masks are the same guys who refuse to wear condoms.
Perhaps we should rebrand COVID-19 as Air AIDS.
Earlier, I considered rebranding COVID-19 as Death Breath, but that sounds like something that could be cured with a mint.
And originally, I thought we could change the Coronavirus’ name to Lung Gonorrhea, because Gonorrhea is one of the most awful-sounding words out there, but then I remembered that lung cancer is a very real thing but that doesn’t stop smokers from smoking. Until it does.
(Apologies to the Beastie Boys)
Stuck at home because the
VIRUS
Barely clothed like Miley
CYRUS
Non-essential stores are
CLOSIN’
Cats are fed and now they’re
DOZIN’
How much longer will this
GO
I’m bad at playin’ domi-
NOS
Lookin’ for a mask, N-Ninety-
FIVE
Get in the car alone and
DRIVE
Give a high
FIVE
You’re still
ALIVE
Oh shit we gotta sani-
TIZE
Trump has pillaged, Trump has
PLUNDERED
But that’s ok cuz you get twelve
HUNDRED