I have questions.
Is the red-shirted guy’s wife ten feet tall or is he extremely short?
Why is he making that face?
Is he afraid of getting splashed and burned?
Does the coffee smell funky?
Is he staring directly at his gigantic wife’s boobs?
Is that a genie emanating from the cup?
Will he be granted wishes?
Or it it an albino octopus arm? Cofftopus!
What are those arcane symbols on the coffee cup?
Is he a warlock?
Who is the guy in the background with the grill and boy?
LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THAT GODDAMN STEAK.
Where can I buy a steak like that?
It’s bigger than his head.
It’s bigger than the boy’s torso!
Is it another boy’s torso?
Where can I buy that grill?
How is he going to flip that huge steak with that grilling fork without bending or breaking the grilling fork?
Doesn’t that boy know that horizontal stripes aren’t slimming?
Why is there a bowl of potato chips on the grill?
Is that a giant pat of butter in the middle of the grill?
Why are half of the hamburgers burned and the other half still frozen?
What is the guy holding in his left hand?
A pack of Marlboros?
A can of Campbell’s cream of mushroom soup?
Why is the guy wearing a woman’s wristwatch?
What’s with those pants?
Is the guy actually ageless ’n’ undead Ted Cruz?
Why are they drinking hot coffee at a barbecue on a hot summer day?
AND WHAT THE HELL IS COFFEE HUNGER!?
I have questions.
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1955 The Nestlé Company, Inc.