Category Archives: captions

When you’re late to the party but the orgy’s just begun.

Kim Crawford Sauvignon Blanc is the perfect choice for a swingin’ Saturday night.

Grab a glass, drop your pants, and undo ordinary.

Flo is imagining you naked.

“Now that’s Progressive!”

The Cigna lady is very pretty, but if we were out on a date, I couldn’t help but suspect she was checking out some other guy behind me.

“This is going to be the most extreme McDonald’s Dollar Menu commercial ever!”

Five seconds later, her hair burst into flames.

Secrets to directing models for a great photograph, part 2,371

“Now act like she just farted.”

The power of the Colonel compels you!

A triumph in genetic engineering, black magic and initial sales, demand soon plummeted for the evil hot wings that noisily regenerated themselves after every bite.

What’s stronger than 29 dimensions of compatibility?

Woo! Check out the rack on that first one!

Advertising Lessons Learned The Hard Way, part 5,219

Make sure your actress likes Greek-style yogurt before shooting your Greek-style yogurt TV commercial.

Modeling Pose #98: Old Navy Beans

A special pose usually only mastered by top models, the O.N.B. combines the mannequin-style “hand on hip, elbow out” look of Pose #2 with the classic arched-back “stinkbug on the beach” posture of Pose #31. Used primarily when the model needs to pass gas during a long photo shoot.

Hoth Pockets!

You know that scene in Star Wars: Episode V – The Empire Strikes Back on the ice planet Hoth after Han Solo found the almost-frozen Luke Skywalker and used Luke’s lightsaber to slice open the gut of the Tauntaun?

These guys remind me of that moment.